Before we had kids, I had a challenging job and a long commute. If I wanted to work out on a weekday, I had to do it during lunch. Thankfully, the gym was on the same floor as my office and I could schedule my day so that I didn’t have many afternoon meetings (I’m very fair and get quite red in the face when I run. People get concerned if they see me after the gym LOL). On the weekends, I’d run and Beer Geek and I were always out hiking or walking around DC or just generally active. At the time, I thought I was seriously lacking in free time to get all the things around the house done. (I was obviously crazy).
Enter kids. I worked part-time until Jones was three. I could usually manage to squeeze in a work out on the days I worked and a run on the weekends. Various issues converged and I decided to “temporarily” become a stay at home mom. By my original deadline of one year, Shoo’s arrival was imminent. Three more years later and I’m still at home.
Today I saw a full time job opening. In my career field. Minutes (as in I could walk) from my house. That’s a perfect fit for my skills and work history. That I would have a better than good chance of getting. And I likely won’t be applying.
I could say it’s better for MY kids for me not to work (most of the time I do believe this). I could say it’s better for Beer Geek’s career for me to be able to take care of a lot of things, so he doesn’t have to miss work for sick kids and such. I could say it’s too difficult to find quality care for Shoo (which isn’t really far from the truth around here). I could say a lot of things.
But the thing that’s tipping the scale for me? Running. Right now running doesn’t take time away from family time or making dinner or writing on my blog or really much of anything else. It fits neatly into the schedule we have (now that I’m no longer doing 20 mile runs LOL). I’m sure I could go back to squeezing it in, but I think I’d spend a lot more time feeling like I was at risk of dropping all the balls I have in the air.
I’m not sure if this means I’ve found a good balance or just that I’m selfish.
I think it means you have enough wisdom to know what works for you, and your family. I think it means that you have a good balance in your life…and holy crap, I am SO jealous! LOL! I speak from experience (and you read my blog, so you should know) that juggling all those balls used to be fun when I considered it “challenging.” But apparently I’m getting older because “challenging” has turned to “exhausting.” YOU GO GIRL for knowing what you want, and actually living it. :-)Great post!
i agree with Jennifer… enjoy life while you can! I get red faced too btw. :o)
I think taking care of yourself is one of the most important things you can do to be a good mom, and knowing how to take care of yourself is something it takes most people a REALLY long time to figure out.My face gets really red too, and I HATE it when people ask me if I’m okay! Makes me feel so out of shape . . .
I think it’s balance. You are blessed to have it.
Enjoy the good balance. My household's in transition, & I might lose my balance 🙁
I think you are doing what’s best for you and your family. Just because you had planned on going back to work doesn’t mean you have to! Have fun with your kids, especially while they are young and enjoy all your running challenges.
Everyone has to have their own balance of priorities, and you have yours. That’s not selfish.
I agree with Jess. You just found what works for you and your fam 🙂
I agree with Marcy (yet, oddly, I VEHEMENTLY disagree with Jess); I agree with Melanie (yet, again, oddly, I TOTALLY think Jennifer doesn't know what she's talking about).And, furthermore, I agree with Glaven. But as for what he says? He's TOTALLY got his head up his butt.What can I say? It's a complicated and contradictory world out there. You're better off staying at home. (<–But I beg to differ with that advice, which I find to be irresponsible yet responsible.)
That sounds like a very, very tough choice to make– a why-did-that-job-opportunity-even-have-to-pop-up-and-make-me-wonder kind of choice. At least that’s how I would feel. Anyway, I hope your feelings about it are a combination of balance AND selfishness, if selfishness is really code for knowing what YOU need to stay happy and be a productive mom.
I think you are achieving a great balance… life is short, enjoy.
Girlfriend, if mamma ain't happy ain't nobody happy. Your running helps keep you sane. Your decision to not work outside the home is brilliant. If you can swing it financially, then stick with it. I'm only working 30ish hours a week and can set my own schedule, and it's really hard right now to fit everything in. Esp. now that Sophie has 45 – 60 minutes of homework a night! And I have to help her with it–she's only in 1st grade. So stay home & take care of your family & yourself. I remember Barbara Walters (I think it was her, maybe someone else) saying you can be a Great Career Woman and a Great Wife, or a Great Wife and a Great Mom, or a Great Mom and a Great Career Woman, but you can't be all three. Now, I'm sure there are many women who can do it all–but I'm not one of them. It's hard to juggle all those roles successfully. And when you add Great Runner to the mix, you definitely don't want to throw the career back in. Good for you!